Relationships can be tricky, sometimes when we are in them we cannot see the truth behind them. So how do we know if we have rose colored glasses on or our relationship really is as good as we think? As a psychologist who has helped people with all types of relationships, here are the top 5 qualities I have seen in good, healthy, and supportive relationships!

1. Open Communication I am sure you have heard it before by communication is key! No relationship is perfect and overtime new things will pop up and develop in every relationship. So the goal is not to be 100% aligned on everything, as this is not possible, but it is the ability to have difficult conversations and excellent communication between the two of you. This means even the really hard conversations on what your partner does that is bothering you, what you need sexually, or where you differ greatly. If you can have these conversations early on in a relationship it will set you up to be more likely to succeed in coming to agreements and providing support to each other when life gets chaotic and complex down the line!
   

2. Trust and Honesty

   Ok I don't just mean that you should be in a relationship where you are not worried about your partner cheating on you (although that is important too). What we are really talking about here is do you feel comfortable being emotionally vulnerable with your partner? Do you feel safe to express your feelings and insecurities without being judged? Do you feel like when it really matters you can trust what your partner says? If so you are in a great place to build a healthy relationship. Trust is such an important building block in a relationship and can be difficult to get back once lost. However, when trust is there each side can approach all situations assuming the best intentions which is huge!! This is also a good time to check in on codependency!

   
   

3. Conflict Resolution Skills (& Ability to Forgive)

   Conflict is inevitable in any relationship. What sets healthy relationships apart is how couples handle disagreements. Good conflict resolution involves active listening, empathy, and a willingness to compromise. It's not about winning an argument, but finding a solution that works for both partners. Additionally, the ability to forgive is crucial. Holding grudges can poison a relationship, while forgiveness allows couples to move forward and grow stronger together. Remember, it's you and your partner against the problem, not you against your partner.

   
   

4. Mutual Respect

   Respect is the foundation of any healthy relationship. It means valuing your partner's opinions, feelings, and boundaries, even when they differ from your own. Mutual respect involves supporting each other's goals and dreams, celebrating successes, and offering comfort during setbacks. It also means treating each other with kindness and consideration in both public and private settings. In a respectful relationship, both partners feel heard, valued, and appreciated for who they are.

   
   

5. Alignment on Big-Picture Goals

   Now I know "big stuff" can be different for each person, but it's important to know your non-negotiables. For many people, this includes whether they want children, their religious beliefs, financial goals, and long-term life plans. While you don't need to agree on everything, being on the same page about major life decisions is crucial for long-term compatibility. This alignment helps prevent future conflicts and ensures that both partners are working towards shared goals. Regular check-ins about these big-picture items can help keep you both on track and feeling unified in your relationship journey.

   
   

While no relationship is perfect, these five qualities – open communication, trust and honesty, conflict resolution skills, mutual respect, and alignment on big-picture goals – form the bedrock of healthy, lasting partnerships. By fostering these qualities in your relationship, you're setting yourself up for a strong, supportive, and fulfilling connection with your partner. Remember, good relationships require ongoing effort and nurturing from both parties, but the rewards of a loving, healthy partnership are well worth the investment.

If you think you could benefit from professional support to explore your relationships or difficulties you have creating healthy relationships reach out to Emily Turinas PhD. Dr. Turinas is a psychologist who specializes in relationships for those in Texas and Colorado. Schedule a free consultation today!